How Can I Deal with the Stress of Divorce?


No matter how simple your case may seem when it comes to custody or assets, a divorce is never easy. A life-changing event like this can leave you questioning your sanity and your life goals. Most individuals experience intense stress during a divorce.

Stress can manifest in many different ways. Some of the most common signs include:

  • Physical symptoms. Chest pain, pounding heart, high blood pressure, shortness of breath, fatigue, loss or appetite or increased appetite
  • Psychological symptoms. Crying, withdrawal or isolation, insomnia, mood swings, worry, restless anxiety

It’s important to remember that these feelings are natural during times of uncertainty or change. But, there are healthy ways to cope. Here are some ways to keep your stress levels down during this process so you can focus on healing and moving forward.

Prioritize Your Emotional Wellbeing

Stress can arise when you try to deny your emotions and feelings instead of acknowledging them. Whether they are positive or negative, heightened emotions are a normal response to stress. However, what we do with these emotions can play a huge role in the quality of life moving forward.

If you are not able to cope with the stress on your own, find a support group or seek out the help of a therapist. Talking about your emotions can help you sort out the best ways to heal and make sure you are taking healthy steps toward feeling better emotionally. If your emotions are on an even keel, you will make better financial and legal decisions during your divorce. Your relationships with your children, family, and even your ex may improve.

Avoid unhealthy coping strategies such as drug use or excessive alcohol. These will only prevent you from acknowledging your feelings and finding the right tools that work for you. Out-of-control anger can affect your relationships at home and at work.

Let Go of Problems You Can’t Control

Many individuals feel guilty after a divorce. You may think you didn’t try hard enough or gave up on your marriage. You may also blame your spouse for something they did. Regardless of the situation, you must figure out what you have control over and then let the rest go.

Living in a constant world of “What If?” will only prevent you from moving forward in a healthy way. You can’t change the past, but you can try to learn lessons from it and focus on a positive present and future.

Practice forgiveness, both for yourself and your spouse. By doing this, you can take time to figure out what is best for yourself and your emotional, physical, and spiritual wellbeing.

Take Care of Your Physical Health

There is something powerful in knowing that your body will take you where you need to go. Especially in times of divorce, making sure you keep your body healthy is just as important as promoting a positive emotional state.

Studies have shown that increasing physical activity can increase endorphins, the “feel-good” chemicals in your brain that relieve pain and stress. Exercise can also improve your sleep cycles and eating habits, which can be impacted by stress and depression.

Pay attention to your body. Looking at everything all at once can make it seem overwhelming. But remember, you don’t have to do it all at once. Go for a walk in the morning, attend a yoga class, or join a group sports team. Do it one or two days a week. Then two or three. Make the next goal four or five days a week. Progressive goals like these are a small yet powerful step in the right direction.

Pay attention to your diet. Avoid excessive drinking or late nights. Lastly, always remember to get plenty of rest so you feel rejuvenated each morning and ready to take on the day with a positive attitude.

Set Small Goals For Yourself

You don’t have to worry about doing everything today. In fact, doing that can seem overwhelming and lead to more feelings of stress. Instead, focus on nurturing yourself with daily activities. Set small goals for yourself each day. Once you can meet these goals, you can slowly start making them bigger, one small step at a time.

Here are some simple goals you can set for yourself:

  • Read a book, blog or listen to music or podcasts
  • Take a hot bath
  • Meditate or exercise
  • Develop a new hobby
  • Make plans with your loved ones
  • Clean/declutter your home
  • Take a vacation

You will not only feel good about hitting these goals, but putting effort into a healthy lifestyle will promote feelings of self-worth, self-esteem, and positivity during trying times.

Surround Yourself With Loved Ones

During a divorce, individuals often feel alone and isolated. While a divorce can be devastating, remember that your life will go on. You can still laugh, play, and have fun.

Rather than withdrawing socially, make sure to spend time with your friends and family. A close circle of friends will provide you with the support you need during times of divorce. You may also have friends that have gone through the same thing as you and can offer relatable advice.

Let Us Handle the Legal Matters

A divorce can leave you feeling many different emotions: confused, angry, scared, and uncertain about the future. We want you to know that you don’t have to go through this process alone.

If you’re going through a divorce, our compassionate Long Island divorce attorneys are here to provide you with the personalized and strategic legal representation you need during these incredibly difficult times. Our law partner, Jacqueline Harounian has an advanced degree in psychology and family therapy. Our attorneys are compassionate as well as strong advocates. Our staff truly cares about your situation and will always be available to listen and help. We can offer referrals to mental health professionals, therapists, and addiction specialists of needed.

With over 150 years of collective experience, Wisselman, Harounian & Associates is the team of legal advocates you want on your side. We will fight hard to ensure the best possible outcome for you and your family.

Let us take the stress off of your shoulders so you can focus on healing with your family. Contact Wisselman, Harounian & Associates at (516) 773-8300 to schedule your free and personalized case review.

Call (516) 773-8300 or contact us online today. Click here for a consultation!